Would you expand your business if you did not have time for it? Well, children are your expanded business in its clearest of terms. A child entering the family either by biology or adoption has a right to “prepared” parents; parents who know that they have now a responsibility on hand; parents who are ready for a new way of life that much includes the child. Not dropping them off in daycares or grandparents place from their 3 rd month of opening their eyes to light!

If there is a plan for providing undivided attention to children, until the age of their acknowledging and seeking peers, that is around 7 years, after creating the opportunities for self-reliance and self-directed learning for the child/ren, then the family is set for a launch of sorts, with the superwoman waiting to take off ….zoooom. But only with a difference that she will take short trips, coming back (mentally) each time to reconnect with her children and stabilize her attachment with them.

So, where could she work? Well, in a place that provides her flexible timing and freedom to hold her children in her subconscious. This will ensure their emotional and physical safety even in her absence.

Employers worldwide realize that a woman who has done justice to her family and made them ready for her role as a career woman is a far more reliable, prepared and power-filled resource rather than someone at loose ends, grappling with marital and parental tumults.

While workplaces do offer crèches or provide measured maternity leave for mothers, the element of the child’s need for a constant caregiver figure is completely forgotten in the formation of his/her personality.

Working at home options are available, of course, but what if she is in mid-conversation or skype and the baby needs to poo? Diapers? call out “Ayaaah”?

Compared to other places in the world, our country has a history of glorified motherhood and hence taking examples of how working women are supported in their workplace overseas seems out of place. A famous mobile company in India, years ago, popularly advertised an “idea” of working mother support. A crawling toddler in the presence of caretaker dai, is coo chickooed through this high tech mobile, by his mother who works in the office of a famous actor who vouches for it! – if it wasn’t withdrawn because of vigilant citizens’ complaint, we would be heading for an apocalypse. So much for positive role-modelling in a society that was gifted with “Maathru Panchakam” by Sri Adi Shankara.

What young girls need today is preparation, for life processes including their own mental and spiritual growth coupled with economic independence that is so essential to maintain their spirit. An introspective journey on what constitutes marriage, parenthood, opportunities for overall development, without compromising on the quality of mothering, and happy living needs to be facilitated by significant adults in her life.

In a job where she can stay connected with her true inner self, ever in touch with her own nature of caring and tending, in a motherly way, she would bring the family’s energy and enthusiasm into the work she undertakes.

However, when a woman is drawn by forces that morph her nature, there is a break in the life chain of interdependence, that causes a withdrawal of resources from nature. The earth, being a giant living organism itself, will lose a soul to a bottomless abyss, even before the journey of evolution into a higher being begins inside her.

A productive working mother tends to her employees and staff as her children. However, she cannot do it if her own house is in turmoil and reeking of guilt and mudslinging. Enabling her family into a position to receive her in her new role is important before she plunges into work. She needs to check the following before she selects the job and commits her time.

  • Is the work to fill the day or nourish her soul?
  • Is it to supplement the family income or become economically independent?
  • Is it worth her time outside her home, when compromises sneak in?
  • Is she able to enjoy her time at home and work?

A “whole soul” searching exercise would establish the answers

  • How much does the family know about child development and the needs of children at different ages?
  • How clear is the responsibility-sharing among family members?
  • Does she have economic independence- access to family funds, irrespective of earning, which signifies respect for her role in the family?
  • How are family routines, moods and attitudes of members, aiding predictability and hence the feeling of security in the environment for the child?
  • How has the training towards independence happened for the children, in being able to fulfil their own needs without depending much on others?
  • How she can protect her family against diseases of the body and mind by adding the love component in the food cooked for them?
  • How she can sense mental and physical problems her family, near and dear ones are facing, but keeping them in her conscious thoughts while at work.
  • How she can prepare the ground for sane and simple living with need-based purchases being the family’s motto in this consumeristic society, by spending time after work, helping them in understanding and fulfilling their hierarchy of needs.
  • How can her Cosmic purpose in life be fulfilled with a dual yet collaborative role?

When she’s answered these with her heart, here she comes,
a suave supermom for her family, a mother for a hundred more!
the world would wake up to welcome her, an ode to this champion, it strums!

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Vidya Shankar

Vidya Shankar

Vidya Shankar is a Child Rights Practitioner and Montessori Specialist with the TN Commission for Protection of Child Rights. Her role as a founder and mentor of the guides team at CFLS, besides being the main guide for Cascade adolescents has made possible the collaboration with Relief Foundation’s rural Montessori centres for mutual benefit and growth.